‘The Intruder’ (2019) Review

‘The Intruder’ (2019) Review

The Intruder (2019) Review: A Crime to Cinema

For many, last week’s ‘Avengers Endgame’ was the peak of blockbuster cinema. Everything from the early days of Jaws and Star Wars paved the way for the monstrous display of superheroics that landed in theatres. A real example that even though it’s never been easier to enjoy a film from the comfort of your own home, there are still reasons to go to the movies. If it seems that it can’t get any better, then the only way to go is down. And there is no further down than ‘The Intruder’

This film is a distinct reminder that not everything that makes it to the cinema is worthy of being there. Going to the cinema requires a commitment. Aside from the price of admission, you have to set aside a particular time in the week for a theatre showing, hope for a reasonable crowd, and depending on where you live or work, make the drive, walk, or run, to your seat. Going through all that just to watch ‘The Intruder’ is a bit like being waitlisted for a fancy restaurant, only to be told the only thing left in the kitchen is soup and bread. And not the good stuff.

The stuff they give away for free.

It’s not a difficult premise to summarise. In fact it’s a stunning parallel to director Deon Taylor’s last travesty ‘Traffik’, which happens to be one of the worst films of 2018. A young newlywed couple, played by Michael Ealy and Meagan Good, are about to start their life in their dream home. They have the picture perfect life, complete with vague professions to keep the characters rich enough for a fantasy, but not too rich to be unrelatable. The only problem is when Dennis Quaid’s Charlie, the previous owner of the house, has a violent reaction to letting go.

It’s the kind of film that’s been done before. ‘The Hand That Rocks The Cradle’, ‘Stepfather’, that one with Beyonce and Idris Elba that if it came out today would’ve made 10 times more money. The formula is always the same. A happy couple with the perfect life has to fight off a violent force. Usually alongside a subplot that mirrors the usual conflicts married couples have to deal with in movies (A flirty secretary, money problems, an intrusive in-law). In the face of death the couple will realise that some things aren’t worth fighting about. The characters are reminded of what’s important, and the audience gets to go experience the thrills of a monster in their own home without the actual blood and gore that comes with it. When done well it can be a winning formula, when done poorly it’s ‘The Intruder’.

Seriously though, make this movie today and recast Ali Larter as Taylor Swift and it makes $500 Million easy.

Throughout this movie you’ll undoubtedly be confused by Meagan Good’s character, who has some of the worst judgement I’ve seen since the OJ trial. Her poor actions are rivalled only by her poor acting, which is not to say her counterparts Ealy and Quaid do any better. Then again, it’s hard to narrow down if it’s the acting that was terrible or if the dialogue was too bad to act. Likely it was both.

Rating: Read A Book

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